Before I head out of town for two weeks of vacation, I wanted to leave you with something to read and think about.
In fact I wanted to share with you something I’ve been learning lately as I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about, well, thinking.
And although this blog is about how thinking plays such a huge role in over-eating, I could have easily written this about over-shopping, over-drinking, over-working, and anything else we do to avoid what we don’t want to face.
So, I hope you enjoy what I’m sharing and find it relevant to what you may be experiencing on your unique journey…
Weight gain, weight loss, or weight neutral… Whatever’s going on in your body has a lot to do with food, but to be honest, it has much more to do with your mind.
And when you take responsibility for what you’re thinking, you have the power to change just about anything about yourself.
To help make this more clear, let me tell you about an imaginary client of mine, Sheila.
Sheila, like many of my clients, hired me down because she wants to lose weight.
In essence, she wants me to give her the exercises and diet ideas and motivation that will allow them her to lose the 50 pounds that she wants to lose.
And the great news is that I can give her all this.
I have fabulous exercise programs that will help her burn tonnes of calories and get strong. I can teach her the nutrition habits and ways to eat that will allow her body to shed the pounds. I can cheer her on and give her all my motivational energy.
But despite all this, it’s almost certain that she won’t get the lasting weight loss she wants.
Sure, she’ll lose some or all the weight, but then she’ll likely gain it right back again.
Unless she faces what’s going on in her mind.
Because Sheila’s weight gain didn’t come from her body, it came from her thoughts and feelings.
The weight gain started when she was trying to avoid negative and painful emotions, like when her boyfriend cheated on her and left her.
The weight continued to grow as she comforted and soothed herself with food whenever circumstances outside her control had the potential to cause her to feel similar feelings of rejection she didn’t want to face.
The weight stuck around because she never learned to face the thoughts and emotions that she suppressed with food all those year ago.
And Sheila’s not unique.
She represents the vast majority of us who use food to make us feel better, and in doing so, put on a layer of fat that we can’t seem to get rid of despite all the diets and exercise programs we’ve tried.
No matter what you may believe about your unique body, the fact is, mathematically speaking, every single body can lose weight, including yours.
To prove my point: If you didn’t eat for a week, you’d lose weight. Guaranteed.
But, as you’re probably well aware, that kind of weight loss won’t work.
Either starvation will eventually kill you, or your mind will go into major feelings of deprivation, and you’ll go about soothing yourself with food as you’ve always done.
Because you tend to go back to what you know, what your brain has practiced time and time again.
You will eat.
And eat, and eat, and eat.
Unless you take a time out and check out what’s going on in your mind.
What are the thoughts and feelings that are constantly popping up in your head, that you may not even be consciously aware of?
Notice them…
Do you always open the bag of chips at the same time of day? Are there certain circumstances where you’ll take yourself out for a container of ice-cream and eat the whole thing? Is there something you’re trying to avoid doing, and for a few moments chocolate seems to do the trick? Do you find when you’re not busy doing something else, you always need to be eating or drinking something?
If you become aware of what’s going on in your mind when you’re doing things you don’t want to do, you’ll have taken the most powerful step you can take to achieve weight loss that sticks.
Why?
Because you’ll become aware of the thoughts that are creating your feelings which are driving your actions which are getting you results, whether you like them or not. And then those results are reinforcing your thoughts and the cycle keeps on going.
So, for example, if you have a thought that says “Why can’t I seem to lose this weight no matter what I do?”, it can lead to negative feelings like powerlessness and maybe even depression. Those kind of difficult feelings will likely cause you to seek comfort so you don’t have to feel them, and the action you take may be overeating foods that comfort you. Then of course, when you overeat, your result will be weight gain. Then that result will only reinforce the thought that you can’t lose weight….
A vicious circle… unless some new thought or feeling is introduced to stop it.
What if you asked yourself a more empowering question like “What do I need to think in order to lose weight?” That’s a much more positive question that may lead to feeling curious and open to new possibilities. And then you may take action by reading, researching, getting a coach, or taking a course about the shifts in thinking that have helped others successfully lose weight, and you begin to apply these new ideas. And the result may just be weight loss, or at least a shift in your belief from hopeless to hopeful.
As powerful as a new thought or feeling can be, however, you’ve first got to be consciously aware of the thoughts and feelings you’re having now.
What I find helpful, is to keep a journal.
Every time you become aware of the fact you’re overeating, ask yourself “Why am I doing this?” and then write down whatever comes to your mind. It doesn’t mean you won’t overeat, but at least you’ll be doing it consciously.
Notice – are you hungry? Bored? Doing this out of habit? Or are you feeling tired, or wanting to reward yourself, or trying to comfort yourself after a tough evening with the kids?
Get to know what you’re doing and why.
It’s amazingly powerful to know get to know yourself on this deeper level.
And I want you to try it.
Next time you find yourself about to indulge or indulging, use this Behavior Awareness Worksheet that was created by Precision Nutrition.
I admit, getting to know yourself by facing painful the feelings you’ve been stuffing down for decades can seem scary at first.
But if you stick with it, you may just discover that those feelings you were so afraid of, don’t actually kill you, and aren’t really as bad as you thought.
In fact, I really believe you’ll discover that the real pain comes from staying stuck in an unhealthy pattern that doesn’t serve you.
I think you’ll discover that it’s much more empowering to take ownership of your thoughts and feelings because then you can begin doing something about them.
And that’s where a coach can be a great help, and this is where as a coach I plan to spend a lot more time helping you.
Enjoy the rest of your summer and I’ll be back with a brand new blog after visiting the Emerald Isle 😉
Keep moving forward,
Debbie