We women come in every shape and size imaginable.
We’re also all ages, all skin tones, all religions, all hair colors, all incomes, all cultures, all abilities, …
We’re all human, and because of that, we’re all beautiful, right?
Well, no, not really.
At least not in our minds.
I just saw the movie “I Feel Pretty” with Amy Schumer.
It was funny on the surface, but the message was deep.
It really made me think… Why do we need to look a certain way to feel pretty?
Because the truth is, pretty is not one thing.
And what we think pretty is varies from person to person… It’s a judgment.
So therefore you can choose to feel not pretty based on your judgment, or you can choose to feel pretty based on your judgment.
Either way, you’re right.
So why not choose, in this moment, to feel pretty?
What’s holding you back from that thought?
In the movie, Amy’s character had lots of confidence when she felt pretty. It allowed her to do things she never would have tried before.
Yes, she did let it got to her head. But in the end the experience opened her eyes to how harshly she had been judging herself.
Now imagine what your life would be like if you chose to feel pretty, right now.
Despite you weight, the shape of your face, the money in your bank account, the year you were born, or the people in your life.
What would change?
I know that this might be a really difficult exercise for you.
Especially if you’ve spent your life chasing the dream of a thinner, richer, or younger looking version of yourself in order to feel better about yourself.
So, if you can’t choose to feel pretty, can you choose to go neutral?
I mean if your ingrained thoughts have been some variation of “I’m ugly”, “I’m stupid”, “I’m old”, or “I’m alone”, try instead to drop the adjective and just go for “I am.”
Go simple.
Just be.
And be ok with just being.
Once you can be ok with not adding the negative adjective, try going a step further to “I am learning to feel pretty.”
If you’ve got resistance to this, chances are that somewhere inside you, you feel that being hard on yourself is beneficial.
But has being hard on yourself really been working for you?
I doubt it.
Because your issue isn’t physical.
There’s nothing that you can change in the physical world that will change the way you think about yourself.
Only you, thinking a new thought, can do that.
Until you can change your thought about yourself, you won’t feel better.
Maybe you’ve noticed this if you’ve ever lost weight, or changed your appearance in some way, or gotten married with the thought that doing this would make you feel pretty or better about yourself.
Did it truly transform what you thought about yourself?
Probably not.
In my life, years ago I settled down with someone because one of my thoughts was “I’m not attractive.”
I thought, here’s an attractive guy who seems to find me attractive, I should go for it, who knows if anyone else will come along.
And what happened was that being with this person did the exact opposite.
I felt ugly when I was with him.
It wasn’t until I was out of that relationship that I began to do thought work, and slowly change my thoughts about myself (still a work in progress).
So, what’s holding you back?
Just because you begin to think you’re pretty doesn’t mean that you can’t change things you want to change.
It just means that you love who you are right now, and because you love yourself you want to do something good for you.
It’s very different when you make decisions from a place of self-love, instead of self-loathing.
So I’m daring you to take a look in the mirror and have a new and better thought to think about yourself.
And keep doing it until you finally realize how pretty you are.
So, I’d love to know what you think.
Do you feel pretty? Do you not feel pretty? Why or why not?
Just leave a comment below. Thanks!
Thought work is the most important work I do as a coach.
Because I know that it’s the only thing that truly makes a lasting difference.
This coming Tuesday, December 11th, I’m offering a free webinar called “How to balance your hormones (and lose the belly fat).”
Yes, I’ll be teaching you tips and ideas that you can implement to have a smooth transition into menopause.
And a significant part of that will be teaching you how to use your thoughts to move through it with strength and grace.
So, I hope you can join me on Tuesday, it will be worth it!
In the meantime, keep moving forward my friend,
Debbie
P.S. If you’d like in on my free webinar, you can register right here: https://debbie-harbec.lpages.co/webinar-balance-hormones-lose-belly-fat